Dateline: Gravois Creek Chronicles

This past week brought the culmination of some month's preparation. On one side, I finished the very long "work blitz" that I had been preparing for since the beginning of the summer. It was hard, but I did like seeing the paycheck last week. That was nice. Another was the 25-year reunion of my classmates from grade school. This would ordinarily sound strange to the general public school person, but this grade school went from K-8, and though I went only for 5-8, it was those formative middle school years, which are generally quite memorable as the beginning of coming of age. (Read: developing friendships, personalities, and of course, bodies.) More on the reunion later--but suffice to say that it was fun and memorable as well. Following the reunion, was the school fair, which I had been planning for for about the last month. My personal role was small, but it was another "thing on the list." The final thing was my 40th birthday, which I hadn't been preparing for, but knew it was coming, nonetheless.
Turning 40, I've decided, is a lot like vanilla: You realize that after all this time, you kind of like it. And now that I'm here, it's kind of a big sigh of relief--I don't have to look at that as a milestone to dread, I've crossed it, and it's all good.
The best part of my 40th was the gifts: books and a bottle of wine from my sweetie, a book and card from the kids, and David, who brought tears to my eyes with this one:
David: I have a gift for you mom, it's here (pointing to his chest)
Me: Oh yea? What is that?
David: It's my heart.
Oh! How sweet--he really is a sweetheart, and I love him, and all my good boys a lot.

Now with the bad news: The day after my birthday, I read about another friend who may not see her birthday. But for her, it's simply the next step she must take. I wish I could be fearless like her, and I'm praying for her and her family.

How Do They Know?

How do they know it's time to act up
when I'm on the phone?
Why don't they know I cannot get up
when I'm on the "throne?"
How do they know it's time to go crazy
when we're trying to leave the house?
Why don't they know how I want them to act-
to be quiet as a mouse?


Why haven't they figured out
when it's time to behave?
Why haven't they figured out
it's peacefulness I crave?
How difficult can it really be
to "go put on your shoes?"
These "geniuses" have me all figured out--
it's my mind they're trying to lose.

This is definitely going to be more like a diary entry than anything. Do you ever get so frustrated about things, then have a total guilt trip, because deep down you know you really have no room to complain? I'm having more of those lately, and I'm not too pleased when I get this way.
Sometimes I get really down about money. I think about all the things we need to do, all the things we want to do, then how much these things cost, and then my brain explodes because I can't reconcile the balance. Big projects cost big money. I'd really like to add a screened porch to the back of my house; my husband wants to fix the fence; I'd be happy with paint and a new bed and bedding; he would like to get rid of our big gas guzzling car, but would be happy to just have the repairs done to both. I try not to get bogged down in the "big" cost picture, because sometimes it's so unattainable, why would I even waste the wish. But as I sat and folded ratty washcloths and noticed that there are even more pairs of little boy's socks with holes in the heels as big as golfballs, I got more and more depressed. Not that I can't buy socks or washcloths, but that those little things put our big goals further and further away. This doesn't even touch college or retirement--leave those be for now, my husband and I simply disagree on how that should even be handled.
Later in the day, as I watched "Emma" for the 100th time while folding clothes (not the Gwyneth Paltrow one, which is lovely, but the REAL one, the BBC produced), I was struck by the relationship of father and daughter, how Emma's father looked at his daughter and worried about her future, and how she comforted him with her "it'll be alright." I felt a sudden flashback to my wedding, followed by a flash forward to now: I'm frequently telling my dad "it'll be alright." And I really believe it. However, I am so frustrated now (going a different direction, so keep up with me, please) because here I watched Emma and her new husband go on their honeymoon, and it made me think about how next week is my 15-year anniversary, and we have absolutely no plans because 1)we really can't afford to go away for a long time or to anywhere truly fabulous, and really we can't even entertain the notion, because 2) we have nowhere to go with our children. We had an overnight alone in the spring, but it set us back $150 for the sitter. Prior to that, our last time away together was to the UK, 9 years ago, when my brother flew us over and put us up for a week--thanks again, Bob! I lovingly jest with my husband that we will someday have our time (remember, "it'll be alright"), but the fact is, I have no idea when, short of waiting until my sons are old enough to take care of themselves, but then we won't want to go, because by then they'd trash the house. It's starting to wear on me, especially when things are delicate in our relationship right now, and I sense it, he senses it, and we have no direction with it.
So I know all things are relative to those who experience it. In the big scheme of things, we have health, food on the table, a comfortable, yet well-worn home, and I live contentedly without fear. This is my brain messing with me. This is my frustration. Ah--I'll go have a glass of wine tonight, and it'll be alright tomorrow.

Oh poop.

One of the hazards of playing with the dog after dark is the kids yelling, "Oh no! I've got poop on me!" And, sure enough, he does. In fact, they all do. Dog doo up their arms from playing with the ball and the ball happened to roll through the "stuff" which then got on their arms. The dog, meanwhile, is skipping about the yard, very happy and having a great time. The boys were stripped down in the backyard (what with there being poop on their clothes, too), and sent to the showers. Makes for an exciting Friday evening.

We Really Appreciate Our Teachers!

Matthew is making a card for his teacher. It is Teacher Appreciation Day. After needing some help spelling the word "appreciation," he is set to create his masterpiece card. He even got to use the special scented markers! The final product: (oh how I wish I had taken a picture, because it is unbelievable otherwise)

(front cover)
Mrs G-thank you for your appreciation

(inside)
Smell this.
From Matt

Bookfair Fun!

This weekend is the Greater St. Louis Book Fair, benefitting St. Louis Crisis Nursery! Don't forget--bring your own bags and a few dollars to spend!
http://www.stlouisbookfair.org/

My son, the flippin' genius

Lately, I have been very down--no need to get into particulars. However, it takes a 6-year old to give perspective sometimes. We were playing frisbee in the backyard, and he says to me:
"Mom, don't you love today?"

"Yes, of course, but don't you want to know about tomorrow? Don't you think tomorrow will be good?"

"You don't know what's going to happen tomorrow. That's why I love today."

Bunco News Edition, April 6, 2010

Last night's events at the Hilltop mansion brought out the people in droves...for the first time (in a long time) all members of the Bunco News group were in attendance, some with allergy eyes and hairy legs. This was all ignored and the festivities began without fail.

Does your dog turn around in circles before laying down? Does it bite all of its own fur off, only to choke on the hairballs afterward? Does it insist on having all of its kibbles separated by shape and flavor? Then your dog might have OCD. Dog expert, Tracey, reported that some dogs experience this phenomena and their owners merely think it's a "cute quirk" and gleefully indulge their canine in its excentricities. Other experts, like Shannon, responded with "as soon as your dog demonstrates human-like idiosycracies and mental illnesses, it's time to get rid of the dog."

This just in....yes, Virginia, the carpet does match the drapes.

Guess who I saw? In this episode of Guess who I saw, we have reports the Jack Deveraux is starring the Fox's production of "Mama Mia." Tony G. is involved with select volleyball, and some A****** posted a picture on their A**book page. Sheesh.

Want to know how to get rid of warts? Visit "Wart Queen" located in the beautiful Gravois Creek valley. No genital warts, please.

No one knows how a fire broke out in Sunset Hills recently. Reports are sketchy an indicate a court jester, several women (who apparently were drinking), and Ty Pennington. Police have tried to investigate, but to no avail. A woman from the group was interviewed briefly. She had this to offer:
Reporter: Ma'am, what can you tell me about what happened?
Woman: Gee, I'm just not sure. First, we were entertained by this fellow wearing sweatpants, only he had one leg in two different pairs of pants. The other leg was tied around his waist. Anyway, this crazy music starts playing, and he starts juggling. Well, then the fire started, and only liquid we could find was a 12-pack of Bud Light Lime. Not wanting the beer to get warm and age prematurely, we drank that while we brainstormed what to do next. You know, cream cheese dip and hummus don't really help put out fires. I guess what we needed was some other liquid, but from where?
Reporter: I guess the mystery still stands. Thank you.
Woman: Sure. Now I gotta go--Ty Pennington is here to help draw up some new kitchen plans.


As sure as one chapter of a book ends, another begins. Dear R, we hope that in the next chapter, the heroine really kicks some butt with the help of some cute kids and a few good friends.
As for S--this hereby ends "The Year of Firsts." I went to the calendar I got when my Grandma died and flipped to yesterday:
"Speak your kind words soon, for you never know how soon it will be too late."
For today:
"God never put anyone in a place too small to grow in." In the most mundane and tedious tasks--like pushing a pencil, changing a diaper, or packing a lunch, it's those everyday things that mean a ton to someone else.

That's all from Bunco News!

Okay, I had to share this one: Jack (formerly "Buzz") comes to the kitchen and starts to take out a few garbage bags from the box. Action:
Mom: What are you doing with those garbage bags?
Jack: I'm making garbage bag clothing.
Mom: No you're not--you have garbage bag clothing hanging in your closet from the last time you made it.
Jack: But this is different--this is for Matt (formerly "Bear").
Mom: No-you're not destroying more trash bags for an entire wardrobe of trash-bag clothing.
Jack: But I can wear one now, and one for special occasions.
Mom: Are you kidding me? You want a fashion line of trash bag clothing?
Jack: But Matt can wear one and I can.
Mom: Now you're just desperate--you're switching your plans around.

Jack is quiet, but hasn't put any trash bags away. Mom continues:
Mom: Okay, you can wear them--with nothing underneath, TO SCHOOL.
Jack: Mom, you're being silly.
Mom: Well then, the answer is NO--no more cut up trash bags.

There is a lull--approximately 2-3 minutes.......then
Jack: Mom, where's the masking tape?
Mom: You mean the masking tape that's supposed to be in my drawer but you borrowed and never returned?
Jack: Oh yeah....
Mom: What do you want it for?
Jack: I'm making the clothes.
Mom: (now starting to laugh) No, you're not.
Jack: But Mom...
Mom: (laughing harder) I can't believe you're arguing with me about this. About TRASH BAG CLOTHES.
Jack: C'mon...
Mom: No.
Jack: Please.
Mom: NO (laughing is louder now--she can't stifle the giggles anymore now). NO TRASH BAG CLOTHING!


I can't believe this is how my afternoon has progressed at this point. What's next? Is someone going to try to play baseball in my basement? And try to rationalize it? I can't wait to hear that one.

Sunday school lesson--Doing the "hard thing"

Today's gospel was about Jesus calling the first apostles. He tells Simon to cast his net into the deeper water. Simon says "but we have been fishing here all night and haven't caught a thing." Nonetheless, Jesus tells him what to do and he does it. The men haul in a huge catch of fish--so full it was tearing the nets. Simon, realizing Jesus' authority as God, falls at his feet, begging forgiveness. Jesus gives him the words of comfort and forgiveness: "Do not be afraid. From now on I will make you fishers of men."

I taught Sunday school this morning on this lesson. We talked about how sometimes we feel just like Simon: we don't want to do the "hard thing"---casting out in deeper water. There are days when we don't feel like being friendly, cleaning the bathroom, doing homework, practicing piano, typing a blog, but yet we need to do those hard things. In most cases, doing them reaps great benefits. Sometimes it comes in the form of a pat on the back for hard work, a kind word, an extra buck (I told the kids), or special privilege. Sometimes, the hard work yields our own, personal satisfaction that we persevered and kept up the hard work, despite what is before us. Here in our corner of the world in Gravois Creek, we don't have to clean up after an earthquake, trying to find our loved ones or a simple drink of water. Our hard jobs are comparably much easier, and yet sometimes we are blinded by our own selfishness to even see beyond the "hard thing." We still need that extra push to cast out into the deep water, and if we do, we will definitely get a full net's worth of fish.

Save a waste?

I feel I am a failure. I have spent outside the budget again this week. Many times I can rationalize it by what I'm buying, and other times, it's just stuff I think would be nice to have (like a new blanket for the youngest's bed so he doesn't need ours), or the husband declares he needs to have yet another toothbrush, since the one I bought is not quite right, even though it is perfectly usable. Off I go, again, to another discount store, to shop. I'm actually sick of shopping.
Today it was shoes for the Bear, blanket (as mentioned before), Wet Ones GALORE, and then I saw leggings for $6, and a discounted jacket for $2. I know that's not much, but it all adds up. I have shopper's remorse again.

Busy!

Before last Christmas, I broke my one-day record for "Most stops made in a single shopping day" and it was 9. 5 in the morning, 4 in the afternoon. Today, I covered 3 stops in about 2 hours, spending 20 minutes at the first one, 90 at the second and 15 at the third, arriving home within 3 minutes of the school bus. I am good.

Just a little venting

You know, when I'm tired, I don't have much option of sleeping on the couch for an hour. I pretty much have to keep going until my head hits the pillow at bedtime, no matter if I've had 3 hours of sleep, or 8 hours of sleep. Meals are still prepared, dishes cleaned up, homework done, laundry (always in progress), random disciplinary measures, etc. Even then, when I go to bed, what, I'm actually tired, and have little patience for anything else? Gee, I'm sorry, I didn't take a nap after dinner, or lunch, or whatever.
Just had to say something.

By the way, budgeting for me is going fine. I'd have to disagree for things that have come up in the last week that have to do with the house, car, and children, but groceries and household junk are still well in check. I'd also have to say that this is for ME only, if you get my drift.

Save away

Well, the update is that I've been overall pretty good and stingy. I'm not so bad that I will sacrifice fresh fruit or veggies yet. Thanks be to God, we haven't had to go there in a very very long time. But I managed to go to Wal-Mart about 10 days ago, and have only been back to the store for milk, juice, bread and apples. We go through about 3 gallons of milk a week, so I'm at Costco weekly doing that. We have been eating our way through the pantry and freezer, and so far, these have been our meals, plus or minus a few I've forgotten:

Soup last week: Lentil, sausage potato chowder
Soup this week: Chili

Chicken cutlets
Roasted chicken
chicken salad sandwiches
potato boats (like potato skins, but I keep the potato in)
Brats
Turkey sausage
Sliced roast beef sandwiches
chili dogs
spaghetti
fish sticks

Lunches for the Mr. have been leftovers, plus a splurge on turkey breast pastrami which is yummy-good. Lunches for the boys have been pb/j, turkey pastrami, cheese/crackers, chicken nuggets, you know, the usual. Fruit/veg for each meal, breakfast has been cereal or whole grain pumpkin bread I made (that was good), and snacks generally goldfish, nuts, bananas, homemade cookies. I keep finding crackers I bought before Christmas, so we'll have snacks for a bit, yet.

A few expenses of course this week: renew Costco, piano lesson tuition, and I believe we're in the market for brakes for my car, and ER copay. Those were expected and unexpected. My splurges this week: I bought lunch for Bear at school--I did this for Buzz a month ago, so it was his turn. I also bought a soda, after about a month-long hiatus from soda. Yea, that was pretty good.

Lunch with the Bear was fun--the thing about elementary school is that they want you there, and are thrilled to sit with you. They don't necessarily want to talk to you, they just want to say to their friends: "look, my Mom's here, and she brought me McDonald's!!" And the friends ooh, and ahhh. It's a good place to be, and I'm glad to do it.

Another update: Yes, yet another ER visit for the family: Bear decided it would be interesting to kneel in the shower (who knows why) and slipped and cut open his eyelid. After much debate between me and the Mr, I conceded, "you won't rest until an actual professional assesses the situation, will you?" and he and Bear were off. I apparently got compliments on my Steri-strip job (thanks to my sis-in-law, the dr., for telling me to do it), and the doctor agreed that while it wasn't a "have to" situation, she'd give the stitches anyway, since it was his eyelid. Maybe I'm ready to do my stint as a medic at the frontlines. Oh wait, that's sort of what I do anyway, isn't it?

Ode to Hot Chocolate on a Cold Day

Frigid hands grasp the mug
And fill it with water and chocolate
And wait for it to get hot

Soothing warmth running
First through my hands
Then to my lips
And down my throat

Creamy Smooth Happiness
Chocolate with a whipped cream twist
Because no one is watching
And I can drink it alone
Watching the cold day pass by.

Eats for Cheap

Here's a recipe for lentil soup that I made over the weekend--about 12 servings is what I got--but I can't quite recall. Anyway, we ate it with cheese garlic bread and it was lovely.

Lentil Soup

1- 1 lb bag lentils (I used the standard green)
1 medium onion
1/2 cup chopped carrots
1/2 cup chopped celery
2-3 cloves garlic, chopped
1 cup tomato sauce (or canned tomatoes chopped)
6 quarts chicken or vegetable broth (I used chicken)
3 strips cooked bacon, crumbled (optional for garnish)
1 1/2 tsp cumin
1 tbsp ground mustard
salt/pepper to taste
olive oil

Heat oil in large pot, add all the veggies and cook until the onions are translucent. Season veggies with salt/pepper. Add everything else and bring to a boil. Then, cover and simmer about 45 minutes until the lentils are softened. Add salt/pepper to taste again. Garnish with crumbled bacon.
I don't have exact figures, but I'm estimating the following costs:
1 bag lentils is about $1, and a bag of carrots around here is $.80 (you only use 2-3), onions--I bought a bag for $2.00, so a fraction of that, celery again, a bag is about $1.30, but only need 2-3 stalks. The bacon is probably the most expensive item, and I bought the precooked bacon on sale for $2. Tomato sauce is about $.50 can, broth is about $.80 a can and you need about 3. To me, salt/pepper/mustard and oil are freebies, because I always have those on hand.
Here's my guess:
$1+.20+.25+.25+.50+2.40= $4.60 Add a piece of bread or the bacon bits, and the price goes up a tad, but considering this makes a ton of food, it averages about $.38 per serving. Not bad at all. And my bread was a store brand which gave me 8 pieces of texas toast, compared to the name brand which only gave me 5. I came out way ahead!

2010: A Odessey, Yes, But Not in Space

I'll have my odessey right here in my own home, thank you very much. It's always an adventure being here and I can say that I'm never bored. The kids give me plenty to do, plenty to laugh at, and lots to love (and hate) about homemaking and life in general. On with 2010!

2009 wasn't a bad year, all in all. Lots of good things happened, lots of bad things and sad things happened, too. I wouldn't say I was happy or sad to see it go--it's just time to move on. I do hope and pray the 2010 is a peaceful year--that'll be the prayer of the year, and, contrary to my very character, I am making a few simple resolutions.
1. I resolve to be more resolute. There. (Ha ha ha ha--no one is laughing but a few of my very close friends).
Seriously, I am going to implement more methods of frugality--as much as I can stand. I will still not concede certain things--I like to get our meat from our local butcher--it is more expensive, but I think it's better. But I can do better on the number of trips I make to any one department store, and list-making helps, coupons, planning, all that stuff goes along with it. I already do this to a degree--but I am trying to make a concerted effort to do better.
Because of this frugality, I will make some financial changes (things I don't want to discuss on a publicly viewed blog) as well.
I am going to figure out what to do with this blog and the other one.
I am going to make some sort of plan for when all the kids are in school full time. (More with the financials, don't you see)
I want to read more (the other blog will help this).
I will finish my professional development requirement early. (Due in November)
I will attend more. (More what? No, Attend. Pay attention.)
So, nothing really new. Just more effortful living--doing the above things a little bit better.

Happy New Year--I hope I remember to check back and see how well I've done. :)